Don’t Be A Revenge Spouse

Motivation, News

Revenge Spouse



“Many spouses see it as their job to obtain justice from the other when wronged. Instead of being quick to forgive, the spouse punishes the other to “get even.” I’ve seen spouses punish the other by withholding affection, giving the silent treatment, or actively hurting the other so the other will “learn their lesson.”
Marriage becomes a courtroom rather than a bedroom, with each spouse presenting their case against the other in a competition and quest for justice. Spouses become plaintiff and defendant against each other, rather than partners together building a home.
This isn’t God’s plan for marriage. If you are a “revenge spouse,” your time together is limited. Your spouse is not your enemy. Your spouse is not against you. Yet so many of us treat our spouses like they are.
James 1:19 says, “Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.”
Twelve words in the Word of God that, if practiced, would make an amazing home. However, we can’t even live out those twelve words consistently. So, what happens when we fall short of this ideal and do and say things that hurt the ones we love? If getting even isn’t the plan, if we aren’t supposed to turn our homes into courtrooms and present our cases against our spouses seeking justice, what are we supposed to do?
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